As I think back to Jr High and High School, feelings and emotions flood back to me - many feelings of insecurity, awkward moments and hopes of fitting in and being like everyone else... though the truth is - a lot of the time I didn't fit in. And I didn't like that. I desired to be liked by girls and have lots of best friends and boys and be asked on many "dates." That is not necessarily a culmination of my experience...but definitely a real part of it.
I am much older now and again find myself in situations where I just do NOT fit in. I am surrounded by women who are consumed by the re-building of their houses. What kind of stone they will use, what new appliances they will buy and who their General Contractor will be. In this area, tearing down your house and rebuilding it - much bigger and "better" is very popular. There is constant talk of it. And those who can't afford to level their whole house just tear out a kitchen or backyard and renovate it alone. And I, who have never even owned a house, in those moments think about how grateful I am that I do not FIT IN.
I do not want to be known for my home on earth, and do not want my days to be focused on the meaningless talk about things that don't matter. I want to be known for my faith, my love of Jesus and people. And I want to have less INTENTIONS...and more ACTION.
Sunday, June 12, 2011
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1 comment:
I think it might be a blessing in disguise that you don't fit in, which is the point of your post.
Owning a house can be tricky. It is like a bride-to-be, or a brand new mom. All they can talk about it the emotional investment they have made. It is a bit riskier because a house is not a person.
Then there is the important question. How can we love our neighbors where they are, for who they are? As new moms, homeowners, & fiances and still feel as if we belong.
Maybe the stronger our sense of self is, the easier it will be to feel a part of a group. I continue to wrestle with this.
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